23/01: SEX TIPS FOR POETS!
SEX TIPS FOR POETS!!!!
1. Do not abuse your muse.
2. Stress the erotic not the psychotic
3. For men poets, three words: condoms, clitoris and Catullus.
4. The most desirable poetic diction uses imagination, intensity and passion.
5. Dramatic poetry has a rising action, a climax and a falling action. Without the rising action the poem falls flat.
6. Avoid Freud.
7. Rhythmic Expression should not be confused with "the rhythm method."
8. If you find a man who not only has, but knows how to use didactic pentameter, hold onto him!
9. Was: "Vini, Vidi, Vici," Is: "Oh! Vini, Oh! Vini, Oh! Vini!"
10. While free verse is the usual mode in today's permissive society, practices such as end rhyme must be undertaken with care.
11. Closed couplets can still be found (& bound).
12. It's a pathetic fallacy that can't perform. (See Literary devices, #19.)
13. Place emphasis on the content and movement of a poem, not on its length.
14. Never refer to the Wife of Bath as a psychopath.
15. If you're a homonym, end rhyme is not only acceptable but expected.
16. Three things of interest to some women poets: Karma Sutra, Climax and Clinton (Bill or George.)
17. For the desired effect when using dialect, let it flick off your tongue.
18. Bravo for Libido, Sappho and Romeo.
19. Literary devices (for extending your metaphor or inflating your diction) are available through selected stores of carnal knowledge.
20. Treat the Marquis de Sade as a demigod. (Optional.)
21. Dramatic monologues can be a natural & exciting means of self-expression. (Also soliloquy.)
22. In the modern world it is useful to be not only Bi-Lingual but cunnilingual.
23. Foreplay, negligee & Edna St. Vincent Millay.
24. Meter? Metaphor for lunch.
25. Keep abreast of the situation and compose from the cockles of the heart!
26. When writing in rhyme royal (tragic or farce) don't be a pain in the royal arse.
27. Please, no exalted odes to the lowly commode.
28. There are many ways to get into the body of a poem, including the Greek way.
29. First person personals: I, ID & IUD.
30. Over the top topics: Mephistopheles, Medussa & Madonna (Ciccone.)
31. Have no hand in anticlimax.
32. If you are experiencing writer's block, shun thoughts of Socrates and hemlock.
*If you can think of any additional Sex Tips For Poets, please forward them to me at Peterpayack.net. They will be evaluated by my intrepid panel of experts, and if they prove reliable, will be included in next year's edition!
1. Do not abuse your muse.
2. Stress the erotic not the psychotic
3. For men poets, three words: condoms, clitoris and Catullus.
4. The most desirable poetic diction uses imagination, intensity and passion.
5. Dramatic poetry has a rising action, a climax and a falling action. Without the rising action the poem falls flat.
6. Avoid Freud.
7. Rhythmic Expression should not be confused with "the rhythm method."
8. If you find a man who not only has, but knows how to use didactic pentameter, hold onto him!
9. Was: "Vini, Vidi, Vici," Is: "Oh! Vini, Oh! Vini, Oh! Vini!"
10. While free verse is the usual mode in today's permissive society, practices such as end rhyme must be undertaken with care.
11. Closed couplets can still be found (& bound).
12. It's a pathetic fallacy that can't perform. (See Literary devices, #19.)
13. Place emphasis on the content and movement of a poem, not on its length.
14. Never refer to the Wife of Bath as a psychopath.
15. If you're a homonym, end rhyme is not only acceptable but expected.
16. Three things of interest to some women poets: Karma Sutra, Climax and Clinton (Bill or George.)
17. For the desired effect when using dialect, let it flick off your tongue.
18. Bravo for Libido, Sappho and Romeo.
19. Literary devices (for extending your metaphor or inflating your diction) are available through selected stores of carnal knowledge.
20. Treat the Marquis de Sade as a demigod. (Optional.)
21. Dramatic monologues can be a natural & exciting means of self-expression. (Also soliloquy.)
22. In the modern world it is useful to be not only Bi-Lingual but cunnilingual.
23. Foreplay, negligee & Edna St. Vincent Millay.
24. Meter? Metaphor for lunch.
25. Keep abreast of the situation and compose from the cockles of the heart!
26. When writing in rhyme royal (tragic or farce) don't be a pain in the royal arse.
27. Please, no exalted odes to the lowly commode.
28. There are many ways to get into the body of a poem, including the Greek way.
29. First person personals: I, ID & IUD.
30. Over the top topics: Mephistopheles, Medussa & Madonna (Ciccone.)
31. Have no hand in anticlimax.
32. If you are experiencing writer's block, shun thoughts of Socrates and hemlock.
*If you can think of any additional Sex Tips For Poets, please forward them to me at Peterpayack.net. They will be evaluated by my intrepid panel of experts, and if they prove reliable, will be included in next year's edition!
14/01: Maxx Payack
